As I write this piece, I am happily, sloppily at home in my workout gear (actually post workout this time, instead of "workout hopeful".) I am not stuck in traffic or having an anxiety attack about the weather forecast or busily packing and unpacking.
Yes, I'm aware it's the Friday of Memorial Day Weekend: the unofficial start of the Summer Season. And, yes, I'm opting to stay at home. And if you are bummed about your boring plans, feeling left out because no invited you to the "party of the season" or frustrated because you need to stay in the city for work or family, I'm here to tell you my five top reasons why you are going to have a great time at home:
1. No Traffic = More Time to Play
As I said before, you avoid traffic. Unless you leave in the middle of the night, you are bound to hit massive traffic jams this week regardless of the direction you head. Just getting out of Manhattan could take two hours. So you arrive at the beach, the mountains, Atlantic City -- wherever -- tired, dirty and cranky. So you've already lost Friday and forget about Monday too. If you stay at home, you have all four glorious days to enjoy. Even if you work a full day on Friday, you're super psyched about the time off, and you're probably not working much because the boss is gone already.
2. The Apocalypse Fantasy Weekend
I don't mean to be morbid, but if you're anything like me, you may harbor rather sick fantasy of being one of the lone survivors of the apocalypse and having the entire city to yourself. Well, staying in Manhattan on a holiday weekend allows you to get a sneak peak of what that would be like. Want to go to that hot new restaurant? No reservation, no problem. On a weekend like this, chances are you can stroll right in. Take in that show at the MOMA without the crowds and lines. Stroll down the Hudson River promenade with your border collie without dogging hordes of skaterborders and oblivious double-stroller i-phone-checking moms. The city is all yours for a few days - so go for it!
3. Keep your Vanity
In my heyday I'd head down to the Jersey Shore for a big beach bonanza on Memorial Day. But that moment would come where I'd have to don a bathing suit for the first time in the season...argh. With very little previous sun exposure, my skin in the month of May is the color of spoiled milk. So I'd lay on the beach self-consciously desperate for a quick tan. Of course, I'd wind up getting massively burned. That's no way to kick off summer. At home, I can wander around in my shorts and a T-shirt picking up some sun in my lonely city without anyone staring. Perhaps if it warms up, I can even go on my roof and get a tan. After all we all know my neighbors will be out of town so there'll be no one to gawk. Bring on the glow!
4. Rest
It's been a long hard winter. Why not rest up on this 3-day'er and get primed for a busy, exciting summer. Sleep in for a few days, take some naps, sit by the river and watch the boats go by -- even better, sit in a park and watch the sailors in for Fleet Week!
5. Opting out = No Envy or Disapppointment
As a New Yorker you know that even if you're having a great time, someone is having a better, fancier, more special time. If you're rubbing elbows with Sarah Jessica Parker at a book fair in Rhinebeck, your best friend is taking a selfie with Beyonce at a black-tie gala in the Hamptons. You can't win. All this build-up for the "first weekend of the summer!!!" will eventually let you down. And the eventual comparisons with your coworkers and neighbors will make you feel "less than." So opt out. Be above it. On Tuesday just say, "oh I can't be bothered with all that Memorial Day nonsense year after year." Because in New York, jaded always wins no matter what.
So stop checking weather.com, quit debating about whether to take your wedges or strappy sandals. Put on come flip flops and join me in having a fun, spontaneous free and easy holiday.
Happy Memorial Day!
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