Being part of my DNA, I understood early on the need to accessorize. Evidenced by my kindergarten class picture which features a jauntiltied tied silk scarf around my Sears and Roebuck dress. Clothes were always important to us. But perhaps more important, was the shopping experience. My mother, sister and I will still pick up the phone following a particularly piquant shopping victory, “I just got four cashmere sweaters at Macy’s 65% off and with a 20% off coupon!” My husband says it’s only a matter of time until they pay me to take the merchandise home.
So, with all that being said, why do I – and every red-blooded American woman -- utter the same desperate cry when opening her closet, “I have nothing to wear!” Why do we continue to shop and buy new clothes and still feel our wardrobe is horrendously inadequate whether it’s for work, a wedding or dinner with friends?A few years ago I actually analyzed this phenomenon and decided to start a side business to address it. Now – having no time to pursue a side anything (unless napping is a cottage industry) -- I’m giving away my knowledge and advice for free.
Well, most likely you have some nice, appropriate items on hand but they are engulfed and hidden by a lot of crap including these common culprits:
- Stuff that doesn’t fit
- Pieces you bought online and feel tepid about but are too lazy to return
- Old favorites which are now out of style but you keep for sentimental reasons
- Old favorites which are too young for you now (ouch!)
- Clothes that need mending or tailoring or are beyond help
The cure is a four-step process: Inventory, Purge, Reorganize, Restock.
Please note: these steps are not for the faint of heart and should NEVER be taken alone. You need my friend Kate – or someone like her. Someone who loves you and has known you through thick and thin (I mean sizes 6-14) but won’t put up with hoodies that make you look like a 15 year-old skateboard punk, or let you keep pants produce camel toe or a tragic VPL (visible panty line), or allow you to resurrect that purple satin jacket from the 90s just because you got lucky wearing it.
Once you’ve chosen your friend then begin Step One: A fearless and thorough inventory of your wardrobe. Pull out all your clothes (and shoes if you have the time) and try them on for your full-length mirror, your friend, and God (praying helps!) Ask yourself these questions for each piece of clothing:
- Does it fit NOW *
- Is it flattering?
- Have I worn it in a year?
- Do I have someplace to wear it (now or in the foreseeable future)
- Does it still suit my lifestyle and age?
When purging is over take a look at what remains and be proud of your work. Take a breath, hydrate and get ready for Step Three. Reorganize your closet and drawers with a system that works best for you whether it’s by season, type of item (sweaters vs. pants) or by purpose (work vs. casual vs. dressy). This way you can go directly to the correct section when it’s time to get dressed. Discard trashy and broken hangers, dust, clean up and make it look friendly. This is also the time to mend, clean or tailor any items that are worth saving but need help.
Once spiffily organized, we begin Step Four: We make a list of what we’re missing and become willing to restock. Most of us have a tendency to purchase the same stuff over again but neglect some staples we really need. I, myself have about a dozen sailor stripe tops but can never seem to find an appropriate cardigan. The reason is simple: I find cardigans boring, but I’m always looking to put something over a shell that’s not a jacket…what could that be? A CARDIGAN?...duh!
Just some of my striped shirts...My kingdom for a good black cardigan!
We’ll also need to replace the staple that have reached the end of their shelf life: the worn out khakis, the snug skirts, the stained blouses and the pilly sweaters, etc.
So, in Step Four we make a list of these items and a promise to restock when we can. If you have some cash flow at the present, then prioritize and make a budget and get out there. If not, keep the wish list handy and restock as you can. Ask for these items as when your birthday, Christmas or Mother’s Day rolls around ask for these as gifts -- or more safely – ask for gift cards to some good stores. And that last part is important. We don’t restock with crap. Seriously, if you’re over 30 stay out of H&M and Forever 21 (sorry Lauren).
When it’s time to shop and try on potential new items, bring a friend and ask yourself those same questions you did in Step One. Disregard sale prices – let the only criteria for purchase be fit, functionality and fabulousness. Don’t settle for mediocre, the garment should make you feel – and look – alive. We live in NYC for crissakes. If the sweater doesn’t break your heart, then move on to the next store** until you find one that does.
If you follow these steps you will love every item in your closet and they will fit you. And I promise you will never say, “I have nothing to wear!” again.
More tips on a happy shopping experience to come!
*Unless you’re in the middle of a successful weight loss plan you must toss all clothes that are too snug. And if you are in the middle of a successful weight loss plan, wait to do this process until you’ve reached your goal. The same goes for those of you who lost weight unintentionally and need to gain it back.
** I strongly caution against online shopping for this exercise because of the importance of trying things on first
