Earlier this month I my husband and I celebrated the birth
of our six year-old. Our pride and joy,
the apple of our eye…our border collie, Rollo.
We often call Rollo our furry baby and joke that we are a “mixed-species
family.” I’m sure our attitude towards our beloved pup inspires a bit of
ridicule from friends and family but we don’t care. We know we are nuts about
the boy (as we call him) and we are ever grateful for how he’s changed our
lives.
Throughout my life I have been no stranger to change. I
chose to go from an enormous New York City public high school to a tiny,
ivy-covered elitist liberal arts college. I spent a year studying in Eastern
Europe before the wall came down. I’ve done crap loads of self-exploration,
self-improvement and self-care. I’ve started and ended business and recently
chucked a 25-year career to go back to school. And I’ve probably had 14 different hair colors
to boot.
But, one of the most drastic changes to my life (and 98 %
for the better) came when we adopted our dog.
Seriously. So, to honor his
birthday and perhaps give a push to some of you out there ready to make the
same life-altering move I offer you this list of Seven Ways My Dog Changed My
Life:
#1 Rollo Killed the
Hermit
Unless you have a little fluff ball of a dog that is content
using a Wee Wee Pad, every dog parent knows that no matter the weather or how tired
and sore you are, you are going out.
And, although at times I have cursed this fate – like during any storm,
or middle-of-the-night emergencies, or his early morning phase – I know that
overall, Rollo was able to banish our hermit tendencies for good. I am a couch
potato who married a homebody. And left to our own devices, we’d spend every
moment cuddled up watching a Breaking Bad Marathon. Rollo gets us out into the
sunshine and into society. We experience life in all its facets, good, bad and oblivious
on the streets of New York. We witness wildlife (mostly squirrels and pigeons,
but also geese, ducks, sea gulls and some other more exotic faunae.) We watch
our neighborhood change as new stores open and close – honestly, we have
probably covered every square inch of real estate below Canal street from the
Seaport to the Hudson. And, we even have
an adventure or two, like when Rollo and I got accidentally locked in a
warehouse on Pier 40 or when we helped a drunk girl get into a cab safely. No matter how exciting it is to watch Walter
White’s escapades, it is much more satisfying to live our own.
#2 Rollo is my Personal Trainer
Exercise regimens come and go. In the past several years, I’ve
belonged to NY Sports, I’ve taken yoga and I’ve bought myriad workout
DVDs. But no matter what I will always
have my own furry personal trainer demanding I walk anywhere from 20 minutes to
2 hours a day. So when I can’t find a
new yoga instructor, I get bored of Zumba or Boot Camp, I know that I will never
be without some exercise in my life and I am grateful for that – and so are my
heart and lungs.
#3 Rollo is my Cruise Director
Just like the Love Boat’s Julie, Rollo conspires to
introduce us to new and fascinating people all the time. Before Rollo came to
live with us, we used to nod politely at our neighbor , Rita, whose door was a
mere three feet from ours. That was the extent of the relationship after many
years of sharing a narrow corridor. But after his arrival, he would bark loudly
and excitedly whenever she arrived home and wouldn’t cease until we opened the
door and greeted her. A simple hello (and a few licks) turned into small
friendly chats, which turned into sharing my turkey chili when she came home
very late and tired, which eventually metamorphosed into dinners at each other’s
home and watching Downton Abbey and Top Chef together each week and
accompanying each other to scary MRIs and emergency room visits – in other
words – a true and loving friendship. We
also befriended the neighborhood dog walker who, despite the fact that she was
born in the Congo, seems to be my long, lost sister (well in attitude anyway!) There
are also countless neighbors, merchants and other Tribeca dog owners who know
us (Rollo by name and me by association!) and are happy to see us in our
travels. Rollo has turned a lonely, cold city into Mayberry for me.
#4 Rollo Forced Me to Grow Up
Despite the fact, that I was in my mid-forties when we
adopted Rollo, my general lack of responsibility (except for my job) kept me in
a state of latent adolescence. I could
stay out all night if I wanted to, sleep all day, forget to eat and not get dressed without any real
consequences (well, on the weekend mostly.) Once we adopted this sweet,
vulnerable creature all that changed. All of a sudden his life, his health and
happiness were my and Steve’s responsibility (thank God I have a partner in
this.) Within days I had to find a good vet and trainer, learn what food suited
him have an ample stock at all times, keep his water bowl filled (heck, buy him
a water bowl!) I had to educate myself on all things canine. It was so stressful for me those first few
weeks that I lost seven pounds! Now that I kind of have it down, I don’t stress
as much but I am still responsible for his care and well-being. And that makes
me a different kind of person. I am tethered, I am important and I am an adult.
Sure, it means that I can’t jet off to Cozumel at the drop of a hat, but being
Rollo’s Mommy (mocking can begin now) is a role that I am honored to play. It
provides a new, deeper meaning to my life (aside from being Steve’s wife and
Barb’s daughter etc.)
#5 Rollo is My Guru
Very few of us have the luxury of the kind of uninterrupted
silence and calmness that allows us to have epiphanies and work out deep
emotions. I do. Often when Rollo and I
are together, we find long stretches of New York pavement where we are alone
(or at least in the company of a few intrepid joggers or other dog walkers.) It
is in these blissful moments by the Hudson that my fevered brain can rest and
my jumbled thoughts can dance before my subconscious and turn into good ideas. Sometimes
I share these notions with Rollo. And although he can’t really speak, I often
can gauge whether or not he approves.
Then there are the days when I am fostering a painful resentment or on
the horns of a thorny dilemma. I also
confess my inner turmoil to Rollo who listens intently and without judgment. By
the time we return home, I have found that most of my dark thoughts have dissipated.
And it’s much cheaper than psychotherapy (believe me!)
#6 Rollo Taught Me Balance
Being the kind of overprotective doggie parents that we are,
Steve and I bought a shelf’s worth of dog books in our first year with Rollo.
What I took away from the many experts I read was that each dog needs three
things to thrive: discipline, food and fun. And, over the years, I have found
that the same rules apply to me, as well.
While Rollo is happiest when his walks and meals fall into a consistent routine
I am also most content when I rise at the same time, take my exercise routinely
and eat at normal intervals. Rollo and I
have invented a few games that he insists we play each day. In the morning he
likes to be jump on the bed and be covered in our blankets, at which time I
must ask nervously, “where’s Rollo?! Where’s Rollo?” Then he pokes his head out
and we all laugh (repeat three times.) At night, after the last walk of the
day, I must chase him back into the bedroom, jump on the bed with him facing
the window and bark at the security guard at the Bank of America across
Greenwich Street. No matter how tired I
am or how many times we performed this odd task, I laugh heartedly and am
magically filled with renewed energy. I
am sure there were times before Rollo (B.R.) that I would go an entire day
without laughing. Now, I’m sure that never happens. Never. I laugh, I giggle and I make up songs about
him on a daily basis.
#7 Rollo Keeps me in the Moment
When you have a lively, intense 65-pound animal at the end
of a leash you have be aware and awake at all times. Especially, when this
beloved beast has a propensity to lunge at skateboarders (and who can blame
him?) I have developed a method to keep us (and others) safe as we walk the
mean streets of lower Manhattan: I scan the horizon and then I look at our feet
and what’s directly ahead and around us. I repeat this ritual a thousand times
during our walks. If I see a wild child speeding along recklessly on his
scooter a block away I cross the street. By looking down and around, I deftly
avoid walking into to other dog’s poo or deep murky puddles. And, so, we arrive home unscathed. This method has helped me stay aware and
awake in my own life as well. Each day I must look ahead and prepare for what’s
coming, but I must also stay grounded and avoid the everyday pitfalls that can
throw me off. While I plan for my new
business, I must also sweep the floor so I don’t track spilled chia seeds all
over the apartment.
A loving dog owner once remarked that, given the relatively
short time dogs, live that as soon as we fall in love with them, we can hear
the clock ticking. Although, I try to push aside this rather somber thought,
what I take away is from that that every moment I have with him – and everyone
I love, in fact – is precious and to be cherished. That keeps me in the moment
and in gratitude.
So Happy Birthday Rollo, and thank you for sharing your life
with all of us.
If someone says no, they say no. Go on to someone else. Don’t
take it personally because it probably isn’t personal. And, if it is, well then
you have a valuable new piece of information (that friend is no friend.) And
the same is true if they judge us – screw ‘em! They’re just exhibiting some form of their own
insecurity if they need to criticize you for needing help or information. 
